My son just about has his papers together, ready to submit to the LDS church. It probably required more preparation than he planned on, including a visit to the dentist, to his doctor, appointments with the Bishop and so forth. He got his hair cut in missionary style and we took a picture to include with the papers. What else does he need to do to be prepared for his mission?
What is Preparation?
Preparation for a mission means getting ready for the right place and the right time. Preparation might also be divided into physical, mental and spiritual levels.
Well, that's how I planned to start this article. Then, I got stuck right about here, even though the direction is probably okay. There are some pretty big and nagging questions here. How can Skill Balancing help my boy prepare for his mission? Is he really prepared? Was I prepared for my mission when I was his age?
Before I left on my mission, I got a wonderful opportunity to manage a restaurant for about a year. With management experience under my belt, I figured I had an edge on some of the other missionaries. Besides, I had also taught a Sunday School class for about a year, gone on occasional working opportunities with missionaries, had years of seminary and so forth. I was ready!
I was wrong.
Well, I was right and I was wrong.
Months later, I remember lying in my bed one evening in Naestved, Denmark, staring at the ceiling after a hard day of work and thinking I was going to die in the mission field! In spite of all preparations, I was still unprepared for some aspects of my mission. From a Skill Balancing point of view, I was overwhelmed. We'll probably get into that a bit more in future articles.
So, how prepared is my son? Just like me, he's had lots of good experiences that have helped him prepare. In some ways he seems less prepared and in some ways he seems more prepared. As his parent, I find myself fretting over it a bit. But, just as I was decades ago, he figures he's ready!
Wrong Time, Wrong Place
When I was in junior high school I was on the football team. I was tall. That was my only asset, besides being good friends with my team mates. Otherwise, I was too thin and terribly uncoordinated. I was also sometimes late to practice, resulting in having to run about 84 times around an alfalfa field that enclosed an 880 yard running track after practice during the season.
My mission at the time was to be a good football player. My main claim to fame, aside from refusing to quit, was once tackling the star player during a practice scrimmage. It surprised everyone. When I got up, the sky was green, the ground was blue and there were stars everywhere.
I was also probably the only one to witness another star player have his leg broken sideways at the knee during practice. I was on the sidelines waiting for my turn to play at the time. Yeah, I really wanted to get out there!
Physical: I just wasn't physically up for it. Later, I was on the track team. I ran long distances but I was slow. I came in last every time I ran in competition, but that's another embarrassment we can save for another time.
Mental: Frankly, I wasn't mentally up for it, either. Who wants to go out on a football field just to add to your personal bruise collection?
Spiritual: And, I wasn't yet ready to meet my maker. I think my coach knew that. Officially, I wasn't permitted to go onto the field during a real game because my cleats were ¾ inch and only ½ inch cleats were permitted. The proper sized cleats were out of stock. How unfortunate.
Wrong Time, Right Place
Part of my job as a missionary was to meet lots of Danish people. We had lots of ways to do that. Sometimes we knocked on doors. Sometimes we just met people on the street. Sometimes we were introduced to others by their friends.
We were interested in finding people who were ready to hear what we had to say. Lots of people told us "no interest". That was okay. We realized that our purpose was to reach people when it was the right time for them. There were lots of situations where it was probably the wrong time.
For example, I remember once when it was really the wrong time. We knocked on one door which was answered by a teenager who was in a bit of a panic. We also heard some unpleasant sounds from inside as though there was some angry discussion among family members. The door was shut quickly. We didn't know what was going on. Then, the door opened and the father of the home appeared, obviously irritated at our having intruded. Without saying a word, he grabbed us both by our coat collars and hauled us to the curb.
Physical: Actually, I was bigger than he was. But, nothing good would have resulted from a rude response.
Mental: One of my companions expressed it best. He pointed out that people who treat others badly often do so because they don't feel good about themselves. This man knew nothing about us except that we were missionaries. Obviously, something bad was happening inside that home and there was a lot of anger before we came.
Spiritual: We weren't angry about how we were treated. We felt more a sense of distress over how the family was doing. We felt disappointed that we were unable to help. As always, we loved and prayed for the people of the country, even those that rejected us.
Right Time, Wrong Place
While serving near Copenhagen, we used the public transportation system a lot. It was excellent, though in some of the further flung areas or later in the evenings the trains did not run as often. That was sometimes bad when we ran late at appointments. Sometimes, we just didn't seem to have sufficient time to make the train. I learned from my companion how to run down stairs at the train station!
Physical: There is no doubt that you have to be in good physical shape to serve on your mission.
Mental: Note to self, keep better track of the time and remember the train schedule!
Spiritual: Don't expect faith to overcome stupidity.
Right Time, Right Place
Recently, Catherine activated her emergency pendant, so I headed home from work. Actually, I usually double check in case it is a false alarm. But, this time I just felt I should head home.
When I arrived home, I found that it was a false alarm. Mike was helping Catherine and she accidentally set the alarm off. However, just as I arrived home Catherine had fallen and help was badly needed to get her back into bed. I happened to be at the right place at the right time!
Since I was home, I offered to take Mike to the doctor's office for the remaining tests. He had planned to walk there after helping his mother. He had no appointment, but we hoped we could get lucky. As it happened, they had available time for some of the tests, but they feared they didn't have the inoculation he needed.
We took the test to the lab to save some time. The lady at the lab asked if we had Mike's insurance card. Fortunately, I happened to have the information needed. When we returned to the doctor's office we found that, luckily, they did have a dosage available so he could be inoculated!
Physical: Physically, we were prepared for this. We've been doing a pretty good job of keeping up with Catherine's condition. Everything is set up to both care for her and respond to emergencies. Since Mike has been working at night and sleeping during the say, we had the added bonus of having him home during any emergencies.
Mental: Mike has been doing a good job of taking on responsibility and figuring out what he needs to do to get his papers in. Also, he and I knew what needed to be done for Catherine. So, when the opportunities presented themselves, we just went with the flow!
Spiritual: Sometimes, when things just seem to fall into place like this, you have to figure that something bigger that you is controlling everything. When you are on a mission, this becomes a source of strength. As we went through this experience, Mike and I just marveled at how things worked out.
Are You Really Prepared?
As we drove away, I explained to Mike that if he is well prepared, he will probably have such lucky coincidences happen on his mission. Looking back, that seemed to happen quite a bit to me while on my mission.
As Mike was investigating all the things he needs to do, he got on the internet and found an interesting reference. It was a reference about a fellow that teaches several classes, including one about preparing to be a missionary. In fact, we found a lot of references and sources for how one prepares for a mission. It seems like there is a potentially endless list of preparations.
So, is he really prepared or not? Was I really prepared when I went or not? All the preparations seem to help with success at the right time and place. But, I note that preparations also helped at other times, too. Whatever preparations I did seemed to help physically, mentally and spiritually.
From a Skill Balancing point of view, missionary preparation involves adjusting skills before and during the mission. That seems simple enough. But, the truth is, a mission is so unpredictable that in spite of everything you do, you may not truly know whether you are fully prepared or not! But, -- and here's the important point - you should still go!
What about your mission? Yes, do all you can to prepare. But, recognize that there are going to be a lot of uncertainties you can't prepare for. Those uncertainties shouldn't deter you from your mission. You should still go.
Mike's papers go in soon. Prepared or not, he's ready. Sort of, anyway.
-- SKS
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